Nothing is done or held onto without an underling cause and if that cause isn’t recognized, one will unconsciously succumb to it and it’s conditioning as if they were a dog on a leash.
When some feeling or emotion arises, something causes it, learn to see the cause of the emotion arising and the feelings that go along with the cause. Whatever arises has a cause, the reason for that cause and the sensation of it needs to be understood if one isn’t to be blindly drawn in and controlled by it. Nothing is held onto without an underling cause and if that cause isn’t recognized, one will unconsciously succumb to the cause as if they were a dog on a leash. Why people don’t see how this holds them in captivity is because many of the things that are being held onto are used to make one’s identity and also the holding is done because your conditioning tells you what you are holding onto is needed. When the cause of what arises is understood or at least noticed, there arises an awareness of what one thinks they need to hold onto. When this occurs there’s the possibility it will fall away and in the process your made up story falls away.
As stated before, why it’s so difficult to see this is because what’s being held onto is thought to be bringing you pleasure, and it probably is in some way, but it’s not true pleasure because no object has the capability of providing true pleasure; one is easily deluded by this. Whether it’s a partner, program, sports team, work, social status, self help, working out, yoga, or whatever is being held onto, if the cause of why one thinks they need something to feel good (pleasure) isn’t realized, the object becomes one’s prison cell and this is regardless of what’s used. So if the cause of why something arises and is held onto isn’t recognized, you might as well keep the dog collar on because when your conditioning says it’s time for a walk, you will have to go because of the conditioning in place.
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