I’ve learned to use meditation as a way to develop discipline, but the question is why was being undisciplined so natural and how come being discipline isn’t? I don’t have an answer, it’s just a question. After sitting periodically my mind began to settle and I saw real results in how my view of life was becoming different and I understood I wasn’t the one doing it. To a point I got why this was occurring and the reason it continues to occur today, discipline has been developed that wasn’t previously there. This is available to anyone who has a willingness to sit.
My life was based on lies that I believed and those beliefs kept me attached to the lies. These were the tools that were developed to live my life, there came a time when I knew I had to find different tools and my so called quest began. Everything I read pointed to the mind so I knew where my answers were, I just didn’t know how they were going to manifest. I did know I had to find some way to allow my self centered mind to settle or my suffering was going to continue.
I began sitting, and as my mind settled I was becoming more aware of the mind agitations that arose, which is what was causing me to reach outside myself for satisfaction. Reaching for something was the means used to quiet these agitations. This is the value of discipline, develop none and you will have none and the developed tools will remain in place along with being controlled by your mind agitations. This is what has been occurring in my life the last twelve years; developed discipline means the mind agitations become less and less and as there is less of them there is more discipline to not give in to them. I never had the discipline to not give in to them so I just did what was there, but today what’s there is different so it has manifested as life being different. It‘s by no means a doing on my part, but there is a willingness to develop the discipline to allow this to take place simply because without it the undisciplined mind will remain in control…
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