If there isn’t awareness of your own selfish behavior, there won’t be anyway of knowing just how self centered you are and how much the self centered energy is in control. Without this awareness you’ll be selfishly taken on a self-centered ride. Life doesn’t do anything directly to anyone, but reactions arise and they determine what kind of behavior you’ll exhibit. Awareness of your arisen reactions is essential if you’re not to be controlled by them. Reactions are a natural part of life they will arise, to me there’s no way of controlling the reactions that arise, but I have found that awareness of them allows for a split second between thoughts that determines whether or not your behavior is self centered or not; remember it’s the attachment to “I” that causes suffering not your reactions.
The Conditioned Mind is diabolical and unless there’s some awareness of how controlling it is, your behavior will be based in selfishness; this has to happen, there’s really no way around it. So subtle is this that even if you are doing things that are labeled as loving, if there’s no awareness of your self centered behavior you’re being controlled; control is control regardless of what label is applied to it. This is why the Conditioned Mind is diabolical because of the subtleness in the way it uses whatever it can to remain in control. Reactions will arise, but they don’t have to selfishly control your behavior. If there isn’t awareness of this, your reactions and behavior will selfishly be attached to which will allow self centered energy to be in control…
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