"I" Urges

Urges arise because “I” wants to satisfy some pleasure it’s making you think is needed, and “I” will win out every time until there’s awareness to not give into the urges and stay out of harms way…


It’s so important to not put yourself in harms way when it comes to urges, but it’s done because the way most minds are conditioned there’s a lack of awareness and discipline to make a stand against the energy of urges for a long period of time. I see this in myself, but very slowly the conditioning that attaches to the urge of “I” is losing its grip. There’s so much of our make up associated with our urges that you should sit with this to see how much control your urges really have over you. This is mainly so because of the temporary pleasure that’s gotten from giving in to the urges. Food, alcohol, drugs, sex (alone or with someone) gambling and so on, many things are used to satisfy the sense pleasures and if there isn’t awareness of this, it will be difficult not to get pulled around by “I” urges.


“I” urges controlled my entire life because of never having the awareness or discipline to not get pulled around by them which always put me in harms way. Of course satisfying “I” is at the root of this and whenever an urge is given into, initially it feels good, but it only last until the mind that told you to give into the urge poses the question, why did you do that. It has taken a few years to finally stop giving in to the urges of pleasure and it’s only because there’s the awareness of “I”. Grab that cookie and see how long the satisfaction last, by the way sugar is more addictive than cocaine. The point of this isn’t to say the pleasures of life can’t be enjoyed, but to just watch who’s attaching to them. See if you’re putting yourself in harms way which reinforces “I”. If this is seen you just may be able to not attach to “I” and lessen the control it has over you so you can truly live a happy, joyous, and free life; free from the alluring urge and control of “I”…

Conflict Within

All conflicts arise from within yourself. They’re derived from internal mind agitations. Without discipline the mind will never settle nor will the agitation of needing to reach for something externally…


The world is in a state of conflict, but not with each other as you may think, it’s with ourselves. The lack of understanding of your own mind is the cause of your inner agitations; most people haven’t a clue this is the cause of all conflicts. We lash out at people, have road rage, try to change people, constantly seek to alter the way that we feel because we were never taught how to just be with life as it is and accept who we are as we are. There would never be a need to have anything or anyone different if you had the ability to just be with life. If you don’t have contentment with the way things are, what makes me think that if things were different there would be contentment; you would still have mind agitations that make you reach for things externally.


External reaching because you want to alter the way that you feel will n
ever amount to true satisfaction, no matter what or who is blamed for the way that you feel. I was always agitated and because there wasn’t an understanding of the Conditioned Mind, the agitation wasn’t understood. It didn’t matter what happened, even if I was told I had six months to live what would it matter, it’s not like I know when I’m going to die anyway, but by not having the ability to just be, the mind becomes agitated and conflicts arise.


Nothing causes discontentment unless it’s allowed. If something bothers you and it can be changed by all means change it, but if it’s being changed because of an inner conflict it needs to be looked at why there’s the conflict to begin with. Even if the thing is changed, without an understanding of your own mind you will just move on to the next thing which will cause you to become agitated and conflicted once again…

Love is Always Right

If I’m right, you’re right, and they’re right, who is truly right? We can’t all be right so who is right is determined by the one who does what they do from the base of love without needing to be right…

Think about this, everyone thinks what they’re doing is right or they wouldn’t be doing it. Whether it’s the Democrats, Republicans, the US, Israel, Palestinians, Christains, Muslims, Hindu’s, all religions for that matter, Al Queda, all the past and present dictators and their so called empires, the different tribes in Africa, or just people in general, they all think what they’re doing is right, but no one truly knows what right is, and get this we can’t all be right, and therein lies the problem. There is no common ground to what or who is right so this makes everyone have a different set of rules as to what’s right, which makes for everyone having their own agenda.

On the individual and group level someone is always trying to force their I’m right will on someone else. The missing ingredient in all this I’m right energy is a genuine desire to do what’s best for someone else with love that comes from the heart. So many people live and act out with what’s in their head and most of it is faulty because it’s not from a genuine love for our fellow beings; it’s from a desire to satisfy self. Even though many people tell themselves what they’re doing is what’s best it’s really only what’s best for them, not for someone else. All that’s needed to see this is to look at our worlds current state of affairs and how this set of rules is playing out. The rules in place are geared to satisfying the self instead of being a benefit to all beings. Until this changes and love becomes the base of the set of rules in place, the world will continue to go in its current direction with everybody doing as they please (because they are right), justifying that the reason they do what they do is for the greater good, even though the greater good in most cases is to satisfy the I’m right self. If what you do isn’t done for a greater good that’s based in love than what you do will be strictly done to benefit the I’m right greater self…

A Mother's Love

A Mother’s love is special because of the connection she has with her child. This connection is unconditional love beyond what words can describe and it’s a love formed in the womb because mom and the child are one…

A Mother’s love is something that needs no words to describe. It’s a love that’s forever binding regardless of what happens. Watching a mother care for her child is so beautiful and this isn’t limited to humans. Mom loves from instincts, it’s a love that occurs from within. Watching a mother take care of her child is the love that everyone should have for each other. This love is the same love that the Universe has for each and everyone of us. A Mother loves all her children the same as the Universe loves all of us the same. Mom doesn’t see color and never puts conditions on her love, she just loves. If we are to survive as a species we will need to go beyond the limits of the mind and see how to love unconditionally. We’ll need to observe how a Mother loves and mimic that with all humanity.

A Mother’s love never ends, there may be disappointment in her heart at times, but that’s only because she wants what’s best and it’s the love in her heart crying out. Mankind is on a course of self destructing and it’s because of the lack of love in their heart. If it’s not seen how the Universe is our mother and we are all brothers and sisters, our separation will be the end of us. Mom is always there for us as is the Universe, but unfortunately we are given enough rope to hang ourselves and that’s exactly what many do. Watch a Mother give birth and see the sparkle in her eyes, it’s the same sparkle (the stars) the Universe has for all humanity. This sparkle arises because there’s no thought of herself, the child born is just an extension of herself; they are one. Only when we all see each other in the same way will we as a species turn our attention to loving each other unconditionally; seeing the sparkle of oneness in each other’s eyes…

Solutions of Love

The more you have to do to make your life complete the less free flowing your life will be, and this free flowing energy is contingent on having love as the base of your solutions…


There are choices that are constantly made which determine your life’s direction, and the key to those choices will be in how engrained the self serving mind is at the base of your solutions. The more engrained the base, whether of love or self serving, the more it determines the solutions used to cope with life. The more the solutions are of the self serving nature which is usually associated with seeking pleasure, the more you have to reach to feel a connection to life, but when it is learned to have solutions that are based in love, life becomes more free flowing, there is less reaching and more peace.


Even if your hearts desire is to save the world it can still be a self serving solution. This can be gauged by the ease in which life flows because there is never any tension in what is being done if it’s being done from a solution based in love. There is never a struggle when life is based in love. It doesn’t mean every solution works out as wanted, but the struggle isn’t there. When there is a true connection with life it’s generally free flowing because love is free flowing. If you are bound up by your solutions they’re more than likely solution based to self serve.


To overcome solutions based in a self serving mind the conditioning that makes this so must be recognized. Once recognized it will be overcome by allowing love to become the free flowing base of your life. Since love is never binding it will be the gauge to determine whether the solutions being used are of love or of a self serving variety. It will be the level of honesty with yourself whether you see your life as free flowing or not. Only you can change the direction of your solutions…

Picking a Side

When you stop picking sides the mind settles into a state of just being with what’s in front of you. After all no side is right or wrong so when none is picked all you are left with is peace…


When a person picks a side, it’s always done with the intention that it’s the right side. What happens next is anyone who isn’t on that side is automatically considered to be on the wrong side. What’s missed when a side is picked is the awareness that there really isn’t a true right or wrong side; there’s only a perception. Get this though, what side is picked is not really the issue, it’s the picking a side that’s the issue. This is because picking a side instantly causes separation, even when people pick the same side. Whether it’s a religion, a political party, for or against something, or just about anything, issues arise because when a side is picked attachments energy begins its control, and with attachment being the root of suffering, well let’s just say there you have it.


The Conditioned Mind has to pick a side, it’s the nature of the conditioning. It cares little what is picked just as long there’s a side picked. It needs to define itself by attaching to something so picking a side falls right in line with its nature. A quiet mind needs no such definition. Quietness isn’t picked, not picking a side simply results in the mind settling and thus quieting. An example would be driving a car and constantly switching (picking) lanes, if you stayed in one lane and simply drove, you would still get to where you were going, there would just be a lot less noise so more peace would naturally take the place of the noise. When you stop picking sides the mind settles into a state of just being with what’s in front of you. After all no side is right or wrong so when no side is picked all you are left with is peace…

No Love in Revenge

Even if you’re wronged and you’re justified in getting revenge, it will harm you more then it will the other person because it will keep you in the grip to an energy that doesn’t allow you to love…


What someone does is never personal even if it is something done to you, but what if what is done affects people you love, then what? Don’t you have the right for revenge? The problem with making it personal is even if you or someone you love is hurt it doesn’t take away the hurt; it doesn’t undo what is done. Revenge, as in an eye for an eye doesn’t really work because it keeps you locked in the same energy as what you are seeking revenge for. You may tell yourself it makes you feel better and you may even believe it does, and to the Conditioned Mind you will say justice is served, but it won’t change any of the facts of what happen. The mind always looks for some form of comfort and it uses revenge as one of these forms.


Things are said like people get what they give out in life and if they hurt others they should get what they deserve, but it doesn’t take away the pain of those who are hurt. That’s the irony of an eye for an eye, it doesn’t really make a person feel better. To me the reason why Jesus taught to turn the other cheek was not for the benefit of the person who is causing the harm, but for your own heart to remain in the presence of love. The mind wants an eye for an eye because it’s part of the conditioning, but for the heart to remain of love the other cheek has to be turned. Your “I” will tell you to attack back, seek revenge, but the heart knows if you want to remain at peace the other cheek will also have to be exposed. This is difficult as is most behavior based in love because of the conventional methods that are in place, but the alternative is to remain controlled by a mind anchored in greed, hate, and delusion. Its a decision that’ll decide your life’s direction and the level of peace you have. The more you try to get revenge whether it’s justified or not, the more you are dragged down into a place that makes love just about impossible to live from…

Completeness of the Heart

If our reliance is on our self we will be severely limited in our inner sense of completeness. Regardless of what’s accomplished the source of completeness is never from our self, it’s always of the heart…

To experience a sense of completeness one must understand what it means to be complete. This isn’t something that comes about by doing good deeds, by volunteering, or by being good. It’s not random acts of kindness that makes one complete, or donating old clothes, none of these things will bring the sought after completeness. These are very good attributes to cultivate and make a part of daily living, but they do not make you complete. It has been my experience that any sense of completeness has to come from within, and it has to be acknowledged through the heart. It’s only through the love of the Universe that completeness can be known regardless of what is being done to try to promote it.

This has been the shift in my journey, to notice how wrapped up I am in myself, but by noticing this I have also been shown the direction to freedom; the direction is to let go of the small me. If we rely on our own self serving limited mind we will faultier and not reach our true potential. We may accomplish great worldly success, but this will be our limit, and it’s a limit that has to cause suffering throughout our life because there’s only a self serving source of strength to draw on. When we rely on the heart for our source for strength, we not only align ourselves to reach our true potential we remove the limits we put on ourselves. We stop being controlled by our small self. This limit on the reliance of self is what causes our incompleteness. Our completeness is in our inner reliance on the heart’s unlimited source of strength, without it the burden to find completeness falls solely on you…

Freedom from Yourself

Your own energy determines how you will live. If that energy is constantly focused on yourself, you will be selfish. If you possess the whole world, but aren’t free from yourself, you’ll remain stuck in your self created prison…

Being free from the prison of self requires turning your energy away from self serving thoughts. When the mind gets stuck in these thoughts, for you to be free your mind needs to become unstuck. What makes it get stuck is your energy is mostly focused on satisfying yourself in some way. Focusing on the sensation of mind, body, and mental formations helps to alleviate the prison of self. This is a direct path to how one can become free from suffering. You can only be free when the focus is on what allows freedom, but it’s tricky because to master yourself takes constant vigilance. It will be your directed focus that determines the extent of your freedom and that will be the determining factor in how your life is lived.

Freedom from suffering is not pain free, it’s learning to be with the pain that arises. You cannot hide from what’s happening, you can only focus on something that anchors you in the Now. To no longer have your focus on satisfying yourself is where freedom is and how this is done is by simply not focusing on yourself and focusing on what will free you. The self is there and it has been given a name, it has so many other different labels attached to it, but it creates a prison because of the mere fact of the attachment to yourself. Freedom occurs when there’s an understanding of the lies, not in creating concepts or beliefs. Where your energy is focused determines how you live. If that energy is constantly focused on yourself, you will be selfish. If you possess the whole world, but aren’t free from yourself, you’ll remain stuck in a self created prison…

Space of Isolation

When the mind settles the need to reach for something lessens, in the process the space of isolation disappears and it’s simply because an “I” story of separation isn’t being created…

The space of isolation seems to get wider as one ages, but it doesn’t really, what happens is there’s just less busyness so “I” takes more of a hold. The natural process of life seems to be to stay busy trying to figure things out, and regardless of what exactly the figuring out manifest as it certainly creates a lot of noise. There are periods in between the busyness where there’s some idle time as the space of isolation arise, but it doesn’t usually last very long because the busyness of trying to figure out life returns. This busyness last most of one’s life, but there does comes a time that the natural process of being busy lessens. At this stage many people experience an isolation that hasn’t been noticed before, it will either be addressed by looking inward or one will get busy again trying to figure out how to fill the space.

Eventually the busyness will end for whatever reason, but unfortunately for most people without the busyness the space of isolation rears its ugly head. Many elderly people struggle with this because there just isn’t a lot going on. Kids are grown, retirement, house paid off, more time behind you than what’s in front of you, and the list goes on; I was busy for many years. There were very brief periods of not needing to reach, but these periods were far and few in between. That is until eleven years ago when I hit an emotional bottom. I began sitting and simply looking inward which allowed me to see the busyness story of “I”. As I sat the mind settled and thus the “I” needing to reach for something lessened. In the process the space of isolation disappeared and it’s simply because an “I” story of separation wasn’t being created…

All Is Well

When a person awakens it doesn’t make them perfect, but what it does do is it gives them an awareness of being imperfect and when one is aware of that and accepts it, all is well...

The are many twist and turns in life. It’s not something that can be figured out. What a strange phenomenon it is, but I wouldn’t change anything about it, mostly because I can’t, but even with all the unconscious suffering that went on for years, all is well. The best thing about my life is all the love I’ve been exposed to. To me in the end it’s the only thing that really matters. At the age of twenty eight I stopped using alcohol and drugs as a coping mechanism, four years later I got married which was over twenty eight years ago. Although that in itself is amazing, at the age of thirty two my father saw a son who caused him years of angst finally stop being a burden to him and to my mom. My Mom died a year and a half ago, my dad died some months after my wedding; my parents seeing me begin to grow up is something I cherish to this day.

The part the gets me the most about being unconscious is the people it affects without any knowledge that it’s happening. From the friends I had growing up, my parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, strangers, and just about anyone else who I had contact with, being unconscious caused much harm. It’s why today my direction is to simply not hurt anyone. I still do because of the conditioning in place, however there is much more space between those unconscious actions than ever before. The unloving energy at the core of being unconscious has lessened immensely. This unloving energy is what makes a person unconscious, and just because you may want to be loving it doesn’t mean you will be, especially if the conditioning in place is unloving. An awakening doesn’t make you perfect. What does happen is it gives you an awareness of being imperfect and when you’re aware of that and accept it, all is well...

Only Love is Perfect

When we live from the hearts intention to love, we are aligned with the Universe and all that is done is perfect because what is done is from the hearts intention to love...

Imperfections are a part of being human, only love is perfect. When we live from our hearts intention to love, we are aligned with the true love that’s natural and genuine, it comes from the heart and whenever something is done from this love it's perfect because it changes people; maybe not all people, but that's because of conditioning. If something is done that’s not from love and someone has issue with it, the issue isn't with what was done. 

One day all of what one has done in this life will come to pass. Everything we leave behind matters little in what is said and done, but the things done from the hearts intention to love are left behind and although what one says and does may not always be agreed with, as long as what's done is from an intention to love it will be perfect. To be imperfect is a part of being human, but love is Universal so when we live from the hearts intention to love, we are aligned with the Universe and all that is done is perfect in love and this is because when what is done is from the hearts intention to love, it touches others regardless if they agree with it or not...

Slander Energy

The small self of “I” slanders as it arises from your own lack. When a person slanders someone it's to subconsciously fill this lack and make yourself feel superior to whomever is slandered...

The reason why slandering someone is so damaging is because of the energy being put out when this is done. Slanders energy arises from one's own lack of self worth and it traps all the slanderers with this lack energy. It doesn't affect the one who is being talked about because for the most part they're probably unaware it's being done. Slander is also very damaging because it involves multiple people, it's like the energy of a riot, neither occur with just one person. Once a person starts slandering someone and another person unconsciously attaches to it, it will continue to grow depending on who's in the room and how unconscious (lacking) they are. It will only be attached to by those who have lack because it's done to fill the lacks void. Even if the slandering is warranted to a degree, no one is perfect enough to cast the first stone. All humans are fallible and act selfishly at times and that's mainly the energy of slander.

The small self slanders someone because it needs to feel superior, so when I talk about you it's only to subconsciously make myself feel superior to you. After all slander is from unloving energy, it's never from love. Slander is what happens when there's idle time and not much is going on. It's difficult not to be pulled into this energy because there's not many people who don't like to feel superior to another person. Slander is shallow and unless there's truly an understanding that you are complete just the way you are and there's no need to talk about anyone else, you’ll continue to harm yourself by talking about others and keeping the selfish energy of slander in place...

Heart Expansion

When you can truly be present for the energy of the heart, all resistance falls away because it’s understood the heart provides expansion and allows freedom. Make this the day your mind doesn’t hold you back…

Most change is resisted and the reason why is because it’s not understood that change is inevitable. If you like cake you wouldn’t want to eat it at every meal. Change is inevitable, but resistance to it doesn’t have to be. Make this the day that your mind doesn’t hold you back. See change as an opening to get you unstuck from the complacency of what’s familiar. Nobody really changes unless they’re forced to because the mind loves the familiar; even if the familiar isn’t what’s most beneficial. I see it all the time in the responses to my articles. All my articles do is provide another way to look at things, but many times they’re just discounted by the resistive energy that’s in place. I lived a conditioned existence for many years so I know what I’m talking about. Not many people truly understand their conditioning so when something new is presented, the resistive energy rears its ugly head and you remain locked to your conditioning.

Change is a natural part of life. It happens constantly whether consciously or unconsciously, but what’s not grasped is although the mind is conditioned to hold onto the familiar, change is needed to expand beyond the familiar. For years I was stuck in familiar mind patterns that didn’t allow anything new in. Even when it looked as though change was occurring, it was only on the surface. Surface change is a society measurement and it’s mostly a facade. True change is a transformation from the head to the heart and it can’t be measured. When you can truly be present for the energy of the heart, all resistance falls away because it’s understood the heart provides expansion and allows freedom so make this the day your mind doesn’t hold you back…

Unconscious Justifications

Not justifying everything that you do creates a tiny crack in the unconscious armor that’s in place. This allows a sliver of consciousness in to possibly change the way things are seen…


When it’s said one is conscious it can be described as being aware of all the different thoughts that arise in each moment; it’s the knowing why you see things as you do. It doesn’t prevent anything from happening, but it can lessen your reactions and some of the consequences associated with what happens; that is if there’s awareness and no attachment. Nothing inherently on its own causes problems for anyone. Alcohol has never poured itself down someone’s throat, it has to be reached for. Heroin never caused anyone to abuse it by putting it in a needle, it’s the individual alone who reaches for it; this goes for anything. Granted most of this self destructive reaching is done unconsciously, but I do what I do today to try and shed light on this. I know a thing or two about this unconscious reaching because I did it for forty nine years.


So many things unconsciously controlled me and as long as there wasn’t awareness of this, they continued their onslaught of control. How this unconsciously gets solidly engrained is by justifying everything that’s done. From pointing out the faults of others, to being nasty to people, slander, and many other justified behaviors, all they do is keep the unconscious mindset in place; unconsciousness breeds unconsciousness. Conscious that this is being done is the first step in breaking the chains of unconsciousness. Stop looking out there for answers, stop blaming and talking about others, in other words stop justifying everything you do as being right and this just may create a crack in the unconscious armor that’s in place, this just may allow a sliver of consciousness in to change the way you look at things. After all, if the way you unconsciously look at things doesn’t change, being unconsciously controlled will remain…